You Already Know What It Is

This ever happen to you? You get in the shower, and youre minding your business, washing your ass. Then your stomach rudely interrupts, talking about girggle girggle son, you already know what it is. The super inconvenient truth. You must take a shit immediately, before you are done with your shower. And who really wants to take a shit AFTER a shower anyway? No one, almost every one will do some form of getting out the shower to take a shit… Two things wrong with that though.

1. If you dont dry all the way off, Youre gonna get water all over the place. Taking a wet shit, to me… is fucking wack lol. Nothing good about being hella wet and taking a shit. If youre a swimmer, I’d imagine you get used to it after a while. So now you have your wet ass sliding across your toilet seat, there is water every where, you probably got water on your roll of toilet paper. Nothing good about taking a wet shit. Not to be confused with a watery shit of course lol. Something totally different. And way more gross lol.

2. The other thing thats wack is… if you did happen to inturpt your shower to “take the browns to the super bowl” (funniest shit i ever heard in my life), when you get back in the shower, its gonna smell like shit in the bathroom! While you still need to finish washing your ass. Even tho, its the aroma of your own fresh shit thats in the air. And usually most people dont really believe their own shit stinks all that bad, except in rare cases, or if you just eat bullshit constantly… your shits probably always stink. You and everybody else thinks so too lol. So like I was saying, even tho its your own stanking ass shit thats smelling up the bathroom, In most cases it wouldnt be so bad. But in cases like this, when you get back to washing your ass, the bathroom will start to smell like soap again. And the “loaf you just pinched”. THEN thats when you really start to notice that it smells like somebody just took a shit in here, mixed with the smell of soap. And possibly whatever aerosol you sprayed. Which in my eyes, just makes it worse. Because then… its steamy in the bathroom, and it smells like somebody just took a crap, mixed with soap, and some kind of artificial summer breeze, or cinnamon something. And if you really blow it… you have some kind of flowery scent, which to me is the worst combo. Lets face it… Spraying some kind of spray after some one ELSE takes a shit… It still fucking stinks! It just smells like flowers and a crap was taken. Which is the worse kind. Its still not bearable. And you wouldnt dare jump your ass in the shower after somebody took a shit, and then tried to spray afterward. It even feels warmer than usual in the air after you go in the bathroom after somebody “dropped a load”. So combined with the steam. Weve all been through it im sure.

But to be honest, thats really not why I wrote all this. So I guess you dont know what it is lol. Anyway… Some time ago, on one of the message boards I used to frequent. There was a discussion or a poll question maybe, asking who pisses in the shower. And it came to my surprise to find out how many people think its absolutely disgusting to piss in the shower. Me personally, I think its natural. You get wet like that, one of the first things youre gonna have to do, is urinate. At least I do. Im sure most people do to be honest. And if you dont, fuck you, who cares lol.
But since I have your mind in the bathroom. I was in the shower earlier, and I thought to myself, some people thinks its gross to urinate in the shower, alot of people dont. But I wonder if the same people think its gross to take a shit in the shower?
Of course it is, and i hope everybody else thinks so too. But sometimes I let my mind wonder, and I look at certain things from the other side, or another perspective.

So, I suppose, pissing in the shower, is just as gross as shitting in the shower… “technically” and I only say that because if you piss in the shower you can just wash it off. Its just pee. If you piss on your self, youre gonna jump in the shower, and wash it off. But if you shit in the shower, technically, you can stomp it in out the drain until it goes away and wash it down the drain. Youre in the shower and you can clean your self off. You would get out just as clean as if you didnt shit in the shower. You would get out just as clean, if you got out the shower to take a shit, and then jumped back in the shower. Youd be doing the same thing essentially, because the bathroom would still smell like shit.  It would be just like if you shitted on your self and then jumped your shitty ass in the shower, and wash out your shitty ass. So why not just take a dump in the shower?
Because that shit is gross. thats why. And if you do, lol youre gross lol. And I can only imagine how it is to step bare foot in some shit. Especially my own. Im only trying to REMEMBER what I ate. Not have that shit stuck in my toes and THEN have to think back. Yuck.
But at the same time, I almost dont want to accept that answer, because gross is realitive. I think dead bodies, and open heart surgery is just as gross as shit, personally. But of course, there are people it doesnt bother so much. So I’d think that there have to be some people who really dont find it gross to smush out their own feces in the shower lol.
So I feel like I need another answer for not shitting in the shower. Not really. But Id like to kind of come up with one lol. And the reason I refuse to shit in the shower is because its easier to shit sitting on the toilet. If you think about it. How long do you think it would really take to stomp your own shit out down the drain. Way longer than it would take to just sit down, shit. Wipe, and move on. So, Ill take the easy, and less gross way out. Even if your wet.
On a some what related note, since im already talking about it. I know a couple people who claim they cant shit unless they are reading something. One of those people used to frequent my house. I have a stack of magazines right by the bathroom door for her lol. And I dare not go in behind her, I think all the words made her shit stink more or something. Who knows.

Of course, what happen was… Yea, I had to take a shit while I was in the shower earlier, and soapy as hell mind you. And I thought to myself… I could just take a shit right here instead of getting on the toilet. But that would be fucking nasty. Even tho nobody would find out lol. But im lazy, so I really did consider shitting right there in the shower, not that I was really gonna do it. But I felt like I considered it way too much or something. Well I guess I did, And thats why I wrote this lol. And for the record, I was done with my shower when I decided that it would be more work to shit in the shower. I swear I dont know because I tried. If I did, realistically, Id say I did lol. But I didnt. At the end of the day, Im not trying to run my foot through my own shit, just to even time it lol.