Uhmblr 2012

Fucking FINALLY! Ive been wanting to put up a new layout for this site for at least 2 years now. It always takes me FOREVER to produce a new layout for this site. If I could, I’d redesign and layout this site every time I learn something new. Thats why I wanted this domain way back, years and many moons ago; to practice and expand my skill set. Usually when I make a new layout for this site Im trying something Ive never done before. Which has lead to SEVERAL layouts never seeing the light of day because by the time I learned what I was doing, I was either no longer interested in the design or …. hell something. I have a least 4 designs where this has happen over the years.

This is the….. maybe 7th different layout of this site since 2001. I feel some kind of way about that, but eh; I lead a crazy life, me and time are in an eternal struggle for power and control and I stay losing lol. I’d really like to practice and expand on my skill set more often, but Im so suck with time management. Im working on it, but like I said, its an eternal struggle lol.

I started on this layout in June of this year and I got it up the same year. This is a pretty big gotdamn deal for me lol.
I started back on June 5th, according to the properties on the psd. Inbetween that time a lot has happen for/to me. I moved, switched jobs twice, lost a car and a lot of other shit. If you know me, you know I work A LOT. In that time I’ve worked several 14+hr days and 60+ hr weeks. I dont know where I found the time to get this done. In years past, this would have never gotten done. I changed directions on the design of this thing, probably 3 times. I didnt and couldnt work on it every day. But Im pretty happy I made it happen. Maybe because I knew what I was doing the whole time I was making this thing. I had a pretty clear vision of what I wanted to accomplish.

Ive noticed that the web is really changing; with more and more people browsing the net on their phones and tablets, I felt like this site should cater to that. I get a lot of mobile traffic form twitter and facebook. Thats where everybody hangs out on the net these days. Nobody is going to search “Black Kayaking Enthusiast” (which I am the top search result for lmaooo) and end up here.  Twitter, Facebook and social media is how people reach personal blogs these days. So I figured that since I got enough mobile traffic that I’d build a more of a mobile friendly site.
I also wanted to do something a bit different, that Ive never done before as well as use colors Ive never really worked with before.

So with me doing something different, I noticed that a lot of tumblr sites dont really have sidebars. Me personally, Ive never really been into side bars, but I never really had an alternative solution. However sidebar info is usually necessary to some degree. When I put together this site, I asked myself:

Aye.. What typically goes in a sidebar any damn way?! Why do I REALLY even need one??? Like REALLY?

Well, if you look at other bloggers, there is usually a quick about section, ad space, links to other sites, category links, tag links, facebook like my page box, social icons and a lot of other bullshit. A lot of other bullshit Ive been tired of dealing with and trying to force on my site for years. Sidebars on blogs really fuck with my OCD. The sidebar content and the main content will never match up in size. So there is going to be a ton of dead space some where. And I fucking hate it. Always have. I once made an iframe version of this site to solve that problem. I just saw the psd earlier when I was looking for a screen shot of this site. The left side had what would be considered sidebar content and the right was for blog entries. Then SEO became super important and there went that lol.

My answer to this was my 90 Seconds with OJ box under the first entry. I figure this:

  • This is the same info that would be in an a sidebar, but instead of being stacked, Its stretched out horizontal.
  • Sidebars either contain information about the sites author or a bunch of ads. I decided to make everything about myself in this area, with 1 Ad. Its kind of like a Mini about page with no about information lol, however Im still all over that box. I SUCK at describing myself or writing some sort of Bio, even a short twitter bio. For years it said “Im me, who you?” The current about text isnt that spectacular, now that I think about it. So I needed something that said a lot of what I couldnt say. I figured my video blog serious “90 seconds with OJ” and social media links with a question to ask me anything would be a perfect substitute  Me personally, I never really read peoples Bio’s if its longer than 4 lines. But I will click through a bunch of links like I have all the time in the world lol.
  • A lot of personal site designs have a similar author box below entries on single entry pages. So I kind of wanted to make a beefed up version that I could use over and over again. … well not really, when I was in the middle of designing this, I said, hey… i could use this in a few other places on the site *self high five!* Good Idea OJ!
  • I really like me; and I figured focusing a portion of the site that some what looked like an entry rather than simple extra content off the to side for which or whatever reason, is something that says: OJ. lol. I feel like Im more of a main feature than a side story.
  • Huny once called my nigga Calvin and I “Grandiose Coons”. Every since then Ive felt the need to live up to those remarks, because it was hilarious and true. Me and this nigga Calvin make a big ass deal out of anything thats about us. Do you know why the domain of this site is “Five27”? Because thats my birthday lol. May 27th. This  site is called “Uhmah Park” because my father used to call me “Uhmah Man” when I was a baby. And thats the name of the logo, the Uhmah Man. Its not a game lol.
  • Lastly, with this site being responsive, I was really like fuck a sidebar. Once the layout starts to conform to a different size screen, the sidebar will eventually fall all the way to the bottom of the 5 or so entries. Which means all the information about me would be at the bottom of the page if you were viewing this site on your cell phone or tablet. FUCK THAT! LOL. I need to be near the top! If you think about it, it makes no sense for me not to be lol.
I have other plans to expand on what Ive done here. I started this in June and I have some other projects that I want to get going. I wanted to start blogging more than I have been over the past few years as well. And for whatever reason, If I dont like the layout of this site, Its hard for me to blog. I dont know what it is lol. Its just how I am lol.
There are a few other things that Im trying out for the first time on this site. Such as the post types. I havent played with it too much, but In later versions of this site (which will probably never happen) I’ll explore this whole post type situation. I have a way I like to format my information and using post types in their suggested manner, will mean that I have to make some compromises. I dont know, we shall see.
This is now my favorite layout. The last one was cool, but I never really finished it, I got to a point where I wanted something up and just threw it up. To be honest, I got lazy with this here too. I wasnt making any money off when I was putting this together, I said fuck it at a lot of different points in production and design. I didnt want this to be yet another layout that didnt make it.
I like it though. Which is a major step for me as well; because as unfinished as I know this site is, in years past, I would hate this shit and I’d probably never blog lol. This psd wasnt even all the way flushed out. I shouldnt even be showing this shit.
But do you see the warlock, Charlie Muthafuckin Sheen sitting there looking like he doesnt give a FUCK in the mock up? Yea, I put that there to remind me: “Fuck it. Do what you feel like doing! Even if it really aint the best thing to do lol, fuck it.”
Here’s the psd. As you can see, there are some changes between the live version and the psd that were made during development. I’d explain but… eeeehhh fuck that. There is a blunt, yet to be rolled, that has my name written all over it. And at this point, thats what I’d rather be doing as this day ends for me.