Uhmah Park

And what manner of Fuckery must we put up with today!?!?

I used to read the comic section daily. Garfield and Non Sequitur are my favorites! One monday morning, in ’03 or ’04, I saw this, and I instantly incorporated the word “Jackassery” and then the remix of it “Fuckery”; into my vocabulary, and I’ve been using it every since. This shit killed me when I first read it lol. Some of my favorite shit ever!!!!! I need to figure out a way to get the comics i used to read to my facebook feed or email or something. I love a good joke

Best Yoga Mat Ad Ever

Another awesome link from one of my favorite friends! This shit here is way too fucking funny. Awesome narration. It needs to be taken to audio; by Morgan Freeman, if at all possible!! lol I cried my own actual tears reading this shit around the 1:15pm mark. I couldnt hold it in any longer. I was at work laughing hard as fuck; openly not working lol. The original post is here. Yoga mat for sale. Used once. – $1 (Bellevue) Yoga mat for sale. Used once at lunch hour class in December 2009. Usage timeline as follows: 11:45a Register for […]

Ray J’s “I Hit It First” read by Morgan Freeman

I’ve never heard the full, real version of this song. And now, thanks to this awesome reading, I will never have to. And if you havent heard the real song, dont worry about it. Just sit back and let the best Morgan Freeman impersonator read the lyrics as if they were an elegant poem. I really wish it was the real Morgan Freeman would have put this out. It wouldve been way too awesome!!   Id point out some choice lyrics in this reading, but the whole thing is just……………………….. HA! I really dont know what else to say lol.

The Batterram – You cant stop this baby!

THIS IS MY SHIT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! So Im minding my own business here at work. … Working and shit like that…. or something like it lol. Out of no where, this song pops in my head. I had to search it. Bumped it, and now Im sharing it with the world; because Im awesome like that. You might have to be from LA to know about this though. I wish I could break dance lol. Id take it to Hollywood BLVD with my boom box and fuck shit up! Everybody would love the nostalgia lol. Hopefully that would result in extra dollers lol. […]

Remember when you were a little kid and completely insignificant things seemed like the most important events in the entire world? Well, that same logic applies to some students in college too. For whatever reason, a certain percentage of dudes in frats and chicks in sororities tend to obsess over social events, and earlier this week, we were all reminded of that via an absolutely hysterical email from a sorority member from Maryland who was furious at her sisters for acting like shy weirdos and whiny little bitches at recent events during Greek Week. It was later leaked to Gawker, and it’s since been making the rounds.

Given how serious it takes itself and how brilliant much of the phraseology is, the geniuses over at Funny Or Die recognized its hilarious potential almost immediately and enlisted Premium Rush and Boardwalk Empire star Michael Shannon for an overly dramatic reading. Not surprisingly, it wound up being hysterical, and it’s trending on its own merits now.

Guttie Shit

Dont catch a Cunt Punt, Bitch!

Michael Shannon Reads the Insane Delta Gamma Sorority Letter from Michael Shannon Lets file this shit right here under videos you shouldnt watch at work. Even with ear buds/headset or what have you. This is classic lol. My homegirl sent me this earlier, and im not going to lie, i wasnt going to watch this shit at all lol. My friends send me tons of shit during the day, some of it I actually find funny, some of it is YEARS old, some of it…. just… lose my gotdamn contact information asshole. But this shit right here; I hit play […]

Easy on my balls, they’re fragile as eggs.

I’m just sittin’ right, in my class at a quarter to ten right? Waiting patiently for the class to begin right? Teacher says “open up your texts and read the first paragraph on Oral sex!” I said “Oral sex!, what kind of class is this?!” The girl next to me said “what’s wrong with you miss? This is a lesson that Makes you feel fine, kinda ease your nerves and relax your mind!” I said “Don’t try to use no hypnotic spell!” She said “Be my assistant, I’d show rather tell!” My knees buckled heart started to drop My dick […]

Bitch Dont Kill My Vibe Remix

  I so need to start blogging more often lol. Anyway, this shit is fucking awesome. Jay came through on his verse, but its clear that K dot was having none of that out shine me on my own song shit. Thats what the fuck I’m talking about. “When I heard that thing he sent back I said to myself, ‘I can’t be no floozy on this mother—er for sure’,” he said. “All them years of being in the studio, all them years of writing, all them years of freestyling and just being a student of the game don’t mean […]

OJ The Snowman Hut

This man Eman is fucking dumb lmao. Out of complete bordom, a few years back, this man decided to go out in the front yard and built a snow man and named it OJ the snow man because I believe snow is a creation of the Devil himself (because it most definitely is). So this year, randomly out of no where; here comes Eman again, with a new version of OJ the Snowman, with a damn story. LMAO   Snowman: psst Me: …. Snowman: PSST!!! Me: Jesus Christ are you fucking kidding me…again? Snowman: WHAT CRACKS MY NIGGA?!?! Me: Thisisntreal thisisntreal thisisntreal […]

Check The Quote – George 2.0

It looks like the homie George 2.0 has an EP coming out soon. This man jumped on his own beat and tore that shit down! I like this. Its going into the rotation when it comes out. This man is pretty damn talented. He has a 1 man play called “Any 1 Man.” I saw it came through Los Angeles. It was awesome, I enjoyed it. Also, and most importantly (lol), he one of the best damn people to party with! Hella good times. George, Benny and Jon G (the man who shot the video) are a mobile party touring the […]