On GP (General Purposes)

I almost died this summer…

i really HATE explaining my self… so buss it…

this is for tha people whos email address i dont have


I know some of you are wondering why I am emailing you because everybody knows I don’t get my email on too often. But whas goin on is im lazy, and I only wanna buss this shit once. So here it go.

A nigga has a bit of news.

As some of you know I got food poison from Mc Donalds on Sunday. And I was bitchin and moanin and all kinda shit. Well turns out I wasn’t food poisoned at all. A nigga had an Ulcer and I was slowly bleeding to death ( thas why my stomach was hurting so gotdamn bad ). And I don’t want a ganga emails on some WHAT HAPPEN?!?!!?!?!?!? And everybody who knows me knows im a lazy nigga which means I don’t feel like typin out a gotdamn story.

So basiclly what happen was:

Sunday I thought I was sick from food poisoning, my stomach was whooping my ass like Roy Jones to a no name ( for those not savvy in boxing… My shit was hurting HELLA BAD! ). Anyway…. Tha shit dragged on for a week till Friday when I was extra light headed and didn’t know why…. Friday night I almost feel on my room mate. At this point I decided shit was serious… so I was like FUCK IT (even tho I fear hospitals somethin retarded) I took my black ass to the hospital where I passed out and this time I feel on my room mate. Come to find out I didn’t have a food poisoning I had a stomach ulcer that was drained me of two thrids of my blood supply (66% for those of you who require number visuals) the nurse in he ER said that I was the whitest Black man she had ever seen (she is a white lady lol) so for the muhfuckas wondering where I been for the last few days….

I been tryin not to die!

Im still here, All praises due to Allah. It took five units of blood. You only suppose to need two so I hear, and my blood level was 6…. 5 is dead so I was told… so I was straddling that SUPER THIN LINE. Right now im at 9… I need more iron… im anemic… I got the ulcer from taking too much aspirin, and not eating with it the shit… im perfectly healthy EXCEPT for the fact that I am anemic and have hella low iron and a hella low blood count. Which is the reason im always cold as fuck, have headaches, tired, lazy ( fucked up huh? ), and cant sleep for shit. So from me being anemic I got the headaches which caused me to take the aspirin, and me being too damn lazy too cook put my black ass in the hospital. But, now I know tha damn problem so whats gonna happen is I have to take iron supplement and eat more and I cant ever take aspirin again for the rest of my life and thenI should be fine. I need to get all this sticky bullshit offa me ( tha hospital heart monitor and iv shit)…. I need to get me some damn rest…


Sorry if some of you didn’t wanna know or didn’t giva shit ( so? Fuck ya im lazy and didn’t feel like unclicking your damn name deal with the shit) Sorry if I don’t talk to some of you as much as you would like or as I would like sometime, don’t really have an excuse… im just bad about keeping in touch sometime. For those I havnt talked to in a hot minute… my bad… I still think of yall sometime… don’t trip. And for everybody that is super concerned. Im OK, trust me. I hate hospitals and I aint tryin to go back no time soon. But Please don’t call my black ass, cuz I really don’t wanna talk about tha shit no more or think about it. Please don’t come back and email me or IM me talkin about… WHAT HAPPEN??!?!?!?!? ARE YOU OK?!?!?!? YES! Gotdammit! That was tha point of this long ass email/note/letter whatever you wanna call it. Im fine… im OK im on that swift road to recovery. And im only explaining this once I don’t care who you are and how many times you ask. Im extra greatful for all those who are concerned and everybody that called the hospital to see how I was doin. And im happy to have so many people that care. But really… im ok… and I don’t wanna speak on it no more lol. I got the best room mate a nigga could ever ask for ( short of a wife or super involved girlfriend ) and she is taking care of me. So I will be fine in no time at all.

Thumbs up.

Talk to some of yall later.


On GP (General Purposes)

Niggas is Skanless

Niggas is skanless….

so i know alotta people on the internet right…

these muthafuckas…

they ask ME how IM doing…

i say… well… not to swift… nigga been sick

they say… sick? whas tha matter wit you?

i say… food poisoning

they say… word? ( or somethin to that effect ) what did you eat?

i say…. strawberry cheese cake from mc donalds

these muthafuckas say ( damn near everybody that has asked so far )… Really?!?!?! the mc donalds out here doesnt have strawberry cheese cake!!

what kinda muthafuckin shit is that?!?!?!?!

for one. fuck me.. im half dead over here gettin questioned on how long muthafuckas done had strawberry cheese cake cuz they hopin they get some out there…

for two. i guess muhfuckas wasnt hearing me when i said… I ALMOST DIED FROM THA SHIT… but they still want some… Niggas and flies!

On GP (General Purposes)

Down With McDonalds Cheese Cake


Do not eat the Strawberry Cheese Cake from Mc Death ( commonly known as Mc Donalds ) That shit is not only slightly bareable…. but… will give yo ass FOOD POISONING!!!!

Spread tha word….

I would… but you see… i am on my gotdamn death bed because nobody warned my black ass. Which is really fucked up… but hey… oh well fuck it… if i survive this shit… the lil nerdy ass white boy and the rest of the empolyes at the Mc Death in Fontana offa the interstate 15 Freeway will soon meet thier maker because i have been suffering from the most horrific stomach pains for the last two days…. AND SOMEBODY HAS TO FUCKING PAY!!

So for the time being i am on some fuck mc death shit.

and you should be too….

On GP (General Purposes)

Who you callin a bitch??!?!

damn im sleepy….

i need to catch me some black out…

but before i render my self comatose

i would like to share one of the funniest muthafucking things i have ever heard.

lady says: hey… you shouldnt call all women bitches!

dude says: hey, i dont call all hoes bitches, sometime i call them bitches hoes!

wooooo…. let me catch my breath lol

i cant figure out why that shit is so damn funny to me.

but then again… when somebody calls somebody else a bitch out of fustration or anger, ill laugh… i dont know why tho.

On GP (General Purposes)

You Surf, ill Cruise, or maybe Stroll

I just thought of something….

One can not deny that the internet is the brain child of a white person or people. Mainly because of the term ” Surf the net ”

Now… if it was the brain child of some one Black or Latino, lol muhfuckas would be sayin “cruise the net” or “stroll the net”

as a matter of fact… i refuse to say surf the net any more, that shit is too damn corny too me, always was. now, its cruise the net or stroll the net.


Your Welcome

On GP (General Purposes)

Nigga huh?


im not gonna front…

i used to like tha shit…

and i still do… and will be downloading the mp3 in a lil while…

but what in tha fuck is a dum dum dittaayyyyyyy?

and what tha fuck would possess a muhfucka to say that shit?

now… i am SAY some retarded shit on a certain subject…

just ask syl…

but… i never make retarded ass sounds…

ok… well i did i when i was lil… hence the word “uhmah”

i was just wondering lol

On GP (General Purposes)

The OJ vs. Ms Cleo Round 1


i know im not tha only person who has seen the new ms cleo commericals wit her talkin about why pay 5.99 per min when you can be paying only 99 cent per min.

what kinda shit is that?

discount bullshit?

i dont giva fuck if im payin 20 bucks a min or 5 cents a min.

if that bitch is suppose to know everybody business and all kinda other shit about people…

if i happen to call her ass and if she dont say… Oh HI OJ!

im cussin somebody out and demanding a refund!

if tha muhfucka know if my girl is cheatin on me or if im cheatin on my girl… or if my baby aint mine or some other dramacydele type shit… she should be able to AT LEAST greet my black ass when i fuckin call. i shouldnt have to tell her ass shit… i should just call… and she should already know im a nonbeliever and get to tellin my future / fourtune… whatever.

and that makes me wonder some other shit… why do muhfucks be so impressed when she tell them some bullshit they ALREADY know??? Bitch! tell me some shit i dont know! Whats wrong with my arm? why it feel funny when i bent it a certin way? what tha hell noise is my car makin?? what in tha fuck is tha problem? and tell me where i can find a good machinc that aint gone rip my black ass off… muthafucka… save me some gotdamn money if imma pay yo ass any where from 1 to 6 dollars a muthafuckin minute! ITS GOOD BUSINESS… CUZ IMMA CALL BACK!! it only make perfect ass sense!

muthafuckas these days fall for anything….

and i know some people is thinkin…. well… shit… i dont call… i dont know nobody that call…

i dont either… but… tha muhfucka got all kinda commericals n shit… not just regular commericals… her shit be longer than mc donalds commercials…

now you tell me…

SOME muthafuckin body is callin…

stupid muhfuckas…

On GP (General Purposes)

The French Porno

some shit.

i just remembered some shit

back when i used to stay in phoenix ( i often refer to the place as hell ) i had some friends or whatever… and we was cool and one not…

but one fuckin day… a couple of us are at the homies house… mind you we never really kick it at this nigga house… but we over there…

this nigga turns on his computer recorder ( tha shit wit tha mic ) and says ” oh… yall watch this shit… its funny as hell ” us… thinking way better of this nigga… we all agree like… aight… what is it? its some shit… us… still not really havin a clue what is goin on…we trust tha muthafucka and we all turn our attention to the TV.

Why in tha fuck did this nigga throw in a french porno?

do you have question marks dangeling above your head?

A french porno is one of them pornos where the muthafuckas SHIT and PISS on each other and think that shit is sexy n all kinda other gross shit. but what was tha gutty part about tha shit… it was already in the middle right on a part were some dude was drinking this ladies piss!

i dont really remember he was drinking it really… but i do remember her being squated over this muhfucka face and her pissin on this muhfucka face.

Anyway… so this is tha first thing we all see. “WHAT THA FUCK?!!?!?!?” is all anybody could really say… followed by a long ass”UUUUGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!” we were grossed tha fuck out to say tha least.

Well… it didnt take long for the homie AJ to throw up… Tha homie Victor almost threw up… his girl had her head burried in Victor shirt… Mo… tha nigga who put tha shit in was in tears laughin at us because he found tha shit hella damn funny. Which leaves me. Call me what you want to. But at first… i was extra grossed out had tha screw face and all that shit… but then after i got over being shocked by piss in dude face… and this fat bitch shitting all over him… i was kinda surprised when i saw tha fat muhfucka shit and piss at tha same time.

I was like… “OH WOW?!?!? this bitch can shit and piss at tha same time… do yall see this shit???” of course i turned around and found nobody really payin attention to me cuz they all had they head turned, and Mo had fallen on tha ground laughin cryin at me because i was really…. i dont wanna say impressed… but damn… tha bitch could shit and piss at tha same fuckin time!! ” naw man… look… this hooker is really shittin and pissing… at tha same time”

“Shut tha fuck up that shit is fuckin nasty” somebody said… i cant remember who

“i know i know… but damn… fuck that… im almost jealous!! dont you know if i could piss and shit at tha same time… do you know how much time that could save me???”

anyway… i was just amazed at this nasty muthafuckas talent of pissin and shitting at tha same time. i dont know… call me werid or whatever… i guess i just think outside the lines… hell i dont know.

but i eventually turned tha shit off after i saw nobody was feeling me.

AJ came back in after he figured out we had turned tha shit off and called me tha strangest muthafucka ever… i guess while he was givin it up he heard me. Everybody is still wondering what tha fuck is wrong wit Mo for putting that shit in. or at least i am

that was some nasty shit

On GP (General Purposes)

Poorly Constructed Plans- Case 897 UPDATE



i know many of you have read the story about the robbery ( i dont wanna give it away for the people who havent read tha shit yet… scroll down muhfuckas scroll down… u can not read this shit if you dont read tha one a few post down… when you get to it… u will know ) Anyway… so i guess this shit has sparked a city wide class reunion for the classes of 97 thru 99. everybody is talkin about this dumb bitch and tha stupid shit these muhfuckas did. My sister ran into one of the girls that shenette was cool wit and my sister asked her what she said and tried to get some detail… However… i guess tha muhfucka is smart enough not to release too much because she know EVERYBODY has found out about tha shit. But she did say this ” it was tha dumbest thing ive ever done ” 😐

My offical comments: NO SHIT?!?!?! kinda shit is that?!?! thas tha dumbest thing ive ever done… bitch! mighty gotdamn LATE to make such a judgment now dont you think?

imma have to find a news clipping for yall muhfuckas ( the regular readers ) and post it on here lol

shit… i wanna make a press pass in photoshop and interview her ass lol

dumb muthafucka…

i hope she read this shit and see that people ALL over the internet are laughing at her. dumb ass.


if there were no dumb asses… the world would be a bornig ass place

On GP (General Purposes)

Fucked up things to say to a female on her period episode # 28

she says: u know… i really hate my period

he says: oh really?

she says: yea man… periods are the worst thing ever.

he says: damn.

she says: i really wish i didnt have to go thru my period.

he says: well, people in hell wish it wasnt so hot…. but they have to put up wit tha shit… just like you have to put up with your period. damn huh?

heh heh…

he is an asshole…

he loves it

she does too… she just wont admit it