he always says lil shit that has me fuckin rollin.

“….. here i have a letter from the national pancake institute that reads: Fuck Waffles! ”

LMAO!!!

“…. dont let me be attacked by a man with a french tickler and a space helmet ….”

lol!!

” ………. have you noticed that mice have no shoulders at all? ”

on slow drivers: ” dont you wish you could have a billboard to broadcast what you think about the person in front of you…………. YOU DRIVE…. LIKE OLD PEOPLE FUCK……….. SLLLLLLLLLLOW AND SLLLLLLLLLOPPYYYYYYYY…….. ”
LMAO!!!

” you know the best thing about leaving on the sea shore? you only have assholes on three sides of you… and if they come from the shore side… you can hear them spashing towards you ….. ”

dammit he is the fucking guts!!!