One day, I was sitting on the toilet and I had an idea, like a lot of people do when they are posted on the toilet. I figure that since I’m not afraid to take a shit in a public restroom and I know some many people who absolutely refuse to under any and every circumstance. I figured maybe I’d give some friendly advice. Look at how awesome and philanthropic I am. Who else would offer such needed yet over looked advice?
So here is my first tip on taking a shit in public or some body’s home whom you may or may not know.
Heres something to be mindful of, when looking for a stall to take a shit in, try to use a stall to your furthest right or left so that you only have one stall to your side rather than having a stall on each side.
Well, its already awkward taking a shit publicly some where. Whats more awkward than having two strangers on your side when youre trying to take a shit? Its already bad enough having one person to your side. Why run the chance of two people on your sides? You can only identify these people by which ever shoes they happen to have on. Thats not good enough.
You also cant guarantee a persons public bathroom etiquette. Is there public bathroom etiquette? Of course there is. But some people just have to make some kinda noise when theyre shitting; from either straining or loud ass booty noises, which is what you really dont want to happen. That shit sucks. Bad. However it is funny as fuck to some degree. Ill give advice on now to handle that situation another time.
Realistically every time you go to take that public shit, you run the risk of having to be next to some asshole with shitty shitting habits. But if you only have one stall next to you, then your chances are automatically cut in half. Ill take those odds all day if I need to take a shit in public some where.
This could all be personal preference though. I dont like to stand next to other dudes while I’m taking a piss if I can help it lol. As far as bathroom etiquette goes, theres an unwritten rule that if you dont have to stand next to me while taking a piss, dont. lol. Use the next stall over sir, I promise I wont take it personal. Thank you, sir.
So there is your first piece of very valuable shitty advice when shitting in public. Put it to good use. Youll thank me one day!
Ive been on a freelance on-site gig for about 3 weeks now. To save gas and to avoid any amount of traffic possible, I take the subway into work.
When im standing around with the crowd of people waiting on a train to show up, i walk up and down the crowd to figure out where most of the Black people will be getting on, so i can get on that train car.
Is this racist of me?
I do this for a few some what silly reasons.
If shit gets way too real, a million feet under the damn ground, id prefer to be around as many black people as possible lol. I live in Los Angeles, being underground is scary as fuck to me and most other people. Not too scared to get on the subway but the knowledge that the ground shakes without warning out is mainly what im talking about lol. Its always in the back of everybodies minds. Not only that, but anything could happen when youre on a subway, theres been all kinds of movies about it lol.
Id prefer being around as many black people as possible because I already know where my level of “fuck this shit” is. And i know a lot of black peoples level of “fuck this shit” is almost as high as mine.
Lets say somebody trys to hold up the train on some terrorist shit, they are NOT going for the car with all the niggas on it.
1. Too many black people means you have almost no bargaining chips. Nobody loses there job or tears over a bunch of Negro casualties. Were an acceptable loss when it comes to shit like that lol.
2. Nobody is gonna hijack any situation where there are too many niggas involved. Especially big niggas like myself. Were not just gonna take whatever L is being served up with out some kinda fight. Everybody knows this.
Maybe Ive watched too many movies. I sit on the train and look at all the types of people on the train and think to myself, if shit gets too real, i gotta go through it with THESE muthafuckas. Lol so id rather be around a bunch of black people. For whatever reason i feel safer lol.
If that racist? Maybe. But I bet theres a lot of non-blacks out there that would rather be on a train with a bunch of black people too. For the same damn reasons lol.