September 2005 - Uhmah Park

MySpace.com, the latest and biggest internet Trend since… the “Live Journal” craze.( that bullshit. Anyway… ) there are tons of community sites out there but myspace seems to be the biggest. And you know why?

My Space is a collective of all the people who fell off the face of the earth to somebody at some point. But now since the creation of MySpace, you can now reunite with you former mates who have all of a sudden surfaced! JOY!!

However… with reuniting with some of your fallen off the earth former commrads. Sometimes you discover why “somehow” you lost contact with them in the first place. And find we our selves once again trying to excuse our selves of their company. but its not like that all the time… sometimes your happy to see your long lost pal, and you can pick back up right where yall left off.

And then you also have the VAST sea of random muthafuckas on the most random of shit. If you like to study people, and have a good browser that will fucking survive blinking text, big ass oversized pictures of random shit, a windows media movie of the latest songs or some truely old shit that will STOP you in your tracks to watch that shit because you havent seen it in THAT long. also your browser might have to be able to survive forign characters that youve never seen anywhere ever before. If your browser can survive all that shit, and other shit im surely forgeting, then MySpace is a great place to go people watching.

Or if youre the type of person that fucks with The INS, you send links of peoples myspace pages to your friends, laughing on instant messenger for way too gotdamn long.

You can browse people with your same interest and see what kind of other people like the same shit you like, maybe discover something about your self that you didnt know. Such as the people who like the same shit you like are fucking werid. “……… so like, does this mean people think im werid too. Like THESE muthafuckas?!?!” ummmm yea, there is a good chance. And if you care enough to ponder that thought for more than 2 minutes, there is a greater chance that people think that same shit you about YOU, that YOU were just was thinking. Congratulations.

But with this Vat of people who disappeared out of other peoples lives. Now they have the chace to appear in YOUR life. Asking you to add them on your friends list. And for what? all to fall off the map again… into aother pool of muthafuckas that disappeard far as you know.

And who do we have to thank for all of this? Muthafuckin TOM! The guy that is automatically your friend when you join. The creator of myspace.com and surely rich by now. And we all want a rich friend or two? Right? Certainly! Maybe thats why no muthafuckin body has decided to delete Tom’s ass from there friends list. I’ll admit, im one of those people. I mean, you know… i would have. But i just never really got around to it. None the less. Thanks to Tom we have myspace, and we have either ran into somebody we havent seen in years, or aquired a bunch of random muthafuckas you added to your friends list for whatever reason.

But have you ever wondered why everybody on myspace is MYSTERIOUSLY in your “Extended Network”? Have you ever noticed that? No matter how OFF the person on myspace is… you go to their page, and some how you are in this persons extended network. And you wonder to your self. Who in the fuck do I know, that knows this person?!?!? Sometimes the people be so wack, you want to find whos friend that is, and delete they ass off your friends list. Like somebody might find out you and this person possibly run in the same circule or some shit. Sometimes i wonder how deep this so called Extended Network really goes. Because that was me one day… trying to find who i knew that knew some muthafucka on myspace that i didnt want no parts of.So i asked myself How Deep is it? Is the extended network 5 people? 9? 15? its hard to say when any and everybody is in your extended network.

But one day, i discovered the secert, i discovered who was responsible to linking me to all those random people. Fuckin Tom!!! EVERY muthafuckin body has him on thier list and hasnt deleted his ass. so EVERYBODY is in EVERYBODYS extended network and there aint shit you can do about it! even if you delete Tom. One of the people on your friends hasnt. and you will be forever linked. Unless of course, you decide to just say fuck myspace, and delete your account, in turn…. falling off the face of the earth, yet again.