Its come to my attention, that some how alot of people have not seen the new overly great and awesome nike basketball commercials. Your bad. I think I’ll take this moment here to deem myself an online commercial reviewer lol. I love commercials.

Anyway. So Nike got Lupe and Krs-One to play as Blitzen and Santa respectively to pair up for a rap battle and basketball game between Blitzen and the Holf gang vs Santa, Kobe and Lebron. So Blitzen starts off, and its not bad:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ies-B3AXc-k
“Santa lookin shook… kobe lookin shook… lebron lookin shook i throw your ball on the roof!”

First of all… why did Blitzen get jiggy on these niggas lmao. This was actually great. I was pretty impressed. I didnt even know it was Lupe, until after I heard it. And Im not a Lupe fan at all. Not saying that he wrote it… who knows. Right when I started to wonder who santa was gonna be and how he was gonna respond.

A quick look through the related videos showed Santas response:

http://www.youtube.com/v/tS58I3hMnG4

!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I wish I had the time to point out every bar of this rhyme and how dope it was. Every single fucking bar was awesome. Clearly…. Krs-One took this faux-battle way too seriously. It was like Lupe jumped on the court to play with Jordan, thought it was all fun and games until Mike banged on his ass for no reason and thought it was hilarious. Like let me remind every body that Im the greatest with this here. It sounded like Krs might have taken this too seriously, but he still thought lupe was a joke. Like dont ever battle me Son! Not for pretend, Not as a joke, Not to your friends when I cant here you and aint gonna find out, not even in your muthafuckin dreams! The drops the mic on this nigga. Good lord!

The line that they beeped out. Im only left to assume that Krs said “you aint even brown nosing, your nose is black” thats the only thing that makes since to me. It doesnt matter what he really said this was fuckin great. I feel like Krs released a new track. All three tracks are going in my car lol. These two beats are fuckin BANGIN. gotdamn

Chris Cringle… the gifts in my salava…
shit…

Anybody else notice that sometimes the snow is falling up in these videos?
... so yea… the third video when they ball:

http://www.youtube.com/v/LfcafAekkLs

Merry Xmas BLITZ!!!!
this shit was the guts…

If you notice, about 1:45 in the video, Kobe throws his patented Kobe elbow LOL

In the words of the reindeer… EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE…

i point out that line because that sound… is VERY similar to the sound that the bumble bee made when he was trying to cheer up JD’s obviously stressful day, that eventful “World Famous Bumble Bee Story” day. Except that the sound the bumble bee made was high pitched and didnt sound like an reindeer being kicked in the ass. just EEEEEEE… the first part… over and over again lololol oh shit lmao

Not really, but yea. This commercial is Hilarious.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Lo5gbTirdn4

With the added guttyness of Peyton Manning, its impossible to go wrong! Sadly this advertising effort will not result in me buying a Bravia. I have a love / hate relationship with Sony electronics. Although I do hear that this tv would play nice with my ps3 and HD sony camera. Yea… thats right, to not really want to fuck with sony shit. I have enough to have enough lol. Sony electronics are high end, but hella over priced. On top of that, you will probably have to buy an accessory that only works with sony shit. IE the media stick. Only recently have sony products incorporated universal media slots. Yet you can only use a media stick with sony shit. Ridiculous. Kinda like how these fools made another commercial with a different joke at the end. Which was hilarious, but not like the other one. lol

Am I the only one who thinks this Quiznos commercial is super gay!? Not gay as in wack. But like, the baker machine implies they did something nobody else should know about and the worker backs this up by looking down talkin about it burned. The machines voice is super fucking deep lol. Meaning there are two guys in this commercial. lol “put it in me”??

Maybe since it look like the baking machine was trying to keep secrets, maybe it was a sexual predator in a past life or something lol. And clearly was a porn director lol.

What a terrible combination lol.

Still the guts tho. Although Im cool on too much man love humor. Im not homophobic in the least bit. Or anti gay. I always tell people that Im more pro boobs-ass-vagina. So thats what I’d rather see. Its all about preference! lol

These are the funniest fucking commercials I’ve seen all damn month. One day, Im minding my own damn business. Blowed. Watching some program that was either News, Basketball or some kind of sporting event or a combination of both…. Sports Center lol And then THIS shit comes on.

Link just for the facist RSS Feeds where YouTube Videos dont show up in for some reason: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GIvHYyv6Om4

Get some bling with Master P-Nut?? lmao what? Peep how when everything broke, the little white boy, broke the fuck out lmao. Extra smooth though lol. It was the walk off white people do when they know they can get any ethic person near by to take the fall for some shit they probably had something to do with. But if they just walk away and dont turn around, it will all go away because they’re white. A white guy actually told me thats a real thing white people do. I was rollin.

Usually when they air this commercial, This shit follows it immediately and doesnt give you a chance to process the first one.

Link: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kBF1lsZUlUI

I thought i was gonna suffocate myself to death laughing at this shit. I was rolling around on the floor and everything. I had to rewind that shit like 4 times. Patrick Chewing?! Firstly, how do you get caught slippin SO bad?! He stood there and took it. I dont know about you. But this looked like revenge to me. For what? I cant possibly imagine lmao. Its either that or Patrick Ewing ... excuse me, Chewing is a fucked up ass person who dunks on people randomly. These two commercials were clearly blowed ideas. There is no other way to explain it. Which brings me to my next point, that inspired a 30 minute conversation between my cousin and I. However sadly, I have lost this conversation. But it was about the most killer thing about this whole commercial. No, not the fact that he dunked on this man and the backboard exploded. Not his short ass basketball shorts and gutty old man basketball get up. But his tragic ass head of slavery naps!!!!!! WHAT IN THE FUCK is going on here?! That shit looks like stacks of fucking sulfur!!! It looks like he refused to comb his hair as long as Bush was in office, and then just forgot all about that shit. JD said it looks like he combs his hair with his hands… LMAO!!!! Nigga what in the fuck is your gotdamn problem? Hair that nappy automatically makes you look like showering is not your thing. Not only that but you probably smell like liquor and or piss or a unfortunately combination of the two and the problems and aromas that come with said situation.
To the credit of the naps in relation to the commercial though. A nigga who walks around with naps on his head like that. Does look like he would run up and dunk on a random snickers eater for no reason. Backboard exploding, shorts, knee pad… all not a surprise at all. The naps told the tail before hand. Of course somebody with naps like that would be up to no good, such as. LOL

This shit is awesome. I wish I could rap, I’d try my hardest to write my best shit ever to this beat. I heard this on the commercial for Skate 2. I damn near wanted to buy the game. But then I remembered this is the internet age. This song was just a search and a couple of clicks away. I wish this could play behind me when I walked down the street. On some Im Gonna Get You Sucka shit. lol. This and the Imperial March… lol thats another post tho lol.

The artist, Oh No is clearly dope. Im gonna have to listen to everything this man has ever made.

Back again, more SuperBowl Ads.

Pepsi Max: I’m Good

People getting injured will never not be funny to me

E*Trade: Talking Baby

“And learn to fllllyyyyy again!” lmao!!! this shit is the guts. My hair used to look like this when I was a baby.

Monster: Need a new job?

This is funny, because its some shit I’d do. lol I honestly dont know if I’d ever stop laughing just knowing that there was a muthafucka in the next room with my mooses ass in its face. Real or not lol A nigga like myself would have more that one person work in the Moose ass room. It would be the guts.

NBC: LMAO

This is great. I love when the internet influences the main stream. This spot should be the place where I buss a joke about white people laughing there asses off and leaving it in the womb, or some other variation of white people (and asians) lacking ass, but we’re gonna skip all that. Word to Obama lol.

Bud Light Swedish

LMAO this shit here is ridiculous. Im glad I was sitting down, or my ass might have fucking fallen the hell off. Jesus!!!! Way to bust on to the commercial scene Conan! Getting started on getting your face out there for the 11 oclock spot. Good way to start lol.

Hyundai: Angry Bosses

do you know why these “Bosses” are really mad? Because Hyundai’s flag ship car looks like a knock off of the big three major luxury brands flag ship vehicels. The shits retarded. That shits look like a very well put together FrankenCar n shit.

Teleflora: Talking Flowers

WOOOOO Classic example of “The Truth Hurts!” These flowers let this lady fucking HAVE IT. BAD! “No one wants to see you naked!” Do you realize how big of an insult that is?! Do you know how many pretty ass girls Ive met who are ashamed to show their bodies!?! They already have issues. But to be TOLD nobody wants to see you naked. Thats that kick to the fucking balls right there lmao. fucking shit.

So maybe the commercials where that bad. I mean, in the past the ads were kinda long. All of these were short and sweet… at least for the most part. The economy is shitty, and peoples attention spans are shorting up. I know mine is super short lol

I love Super Bowl Commercials. Actually, I love commercials in general. Which is kinda surprising to me because I go through a great deal to avoid them sometimes. Anyway, this years round of superbowl commercials were definitely lack luster. I think I only liked maybe three commercials that werent trailers. Super Bowl Commercials have been on the decline steadily for the past few years. But whatever, the internet is changing shit. I happens. None the less though. Marketing and Advertising is starting to truly fascinate me. But some of these commercials, somebody should have lost their damn job lol.
Lucky for me, Hulu has them all hosted for me to review. I didnt know there were so many though.But I did notice that I never really saw the same commercial twice. Which was kind of surprising.

Go Daddy: Shower

I cant believe Danica Patrick signed up for both of these Go Daddy commercials. Im not gonna front, shes reasonably sexy, but these seem kinda racy and exploitative (maybe ive just been watching alot of political tv lately). Not that I mind, Im just sayin Im surprised that she signed up for em. High five to her though. As a man, I liked em just because of the obvious.
I also cant believe they got away with showing these commercials during a “family show”. I guess you can imply titty, but dare not show the titty. Which is understandable, except for there was a major flip out over the shown titty. These commercials implied a whole bunch, and even lesbian acts. Family show still? Whatever… Im not complaining, Im just saying.

Pedigree: Crazy Pets

Yea, foreal… get a fucking dog. Because if muthafuckas start getting ostrichs that rush muthafuckas that come to the door. Im going to start walking around with a large caliber firing arm and I firers NO warning shots. At all. If you dont have control on your pet, Im murdering that muthafucka with out a second thought. Im putting slugs in your Yak, fuckin Ostrich, Rhino, Badger, I dont give a fuck. Get a gotdamn dogg lol The thought of the possibility of me in this commercial freaks me out lol Im from South Central, I dont do animals. Fuck that. Id rather deal with a street full of crips rather than a gotdamn bear any damn day. Thats real.

Pepsi: McGruber

This was fucking DUMB. The end. Might explain why pepsi is fucking gross. They should have remixed the My Generation commercial. Or held on to it and had this bullshit running for the last few months.

Hulu: Alec in Huluwood

This shit here is the guts for a lot of reasons. Alec Baldwin gets my vote as the best Baldwin. He’s the fuckin guts. “Im starting to drool…” Hilarious. You sure the fuck arent going to turn off your tv or your computer. Its great. Im on the wrong side of the rope. I will be on the other side soon though. Its great. Im excited.

GE: Scarecrow

Not only does this commercial remind me of somebody close to my heart. But its SUPER fucking funny because at the end the scare crow gave that crow the business on the way on down the road. LMAO!!! Little shit like that is funny to me.

Cash4Gold.com: Heeere’s Money

This here, what can I say about this shit here? This commercial get the WFT Award for this years Super Bowl Commercials. Id like to point out a few things about this commercial. Firstly, it looks like cash4gold.com specifically goes after big stars who have had financial trouble. Which is funny as fuck and equally as brilliant. When I first saw cash4gold.com commercials a few years ago, late late at night. I thought it was a pretty scandolous yet genious idea. But this shit here was almost as random was the Vlade / Dawkins Taco Bell Commercial. Almost. But what im starting to wonder is, I wonder if that white lady they used to have went broke at some point? Who the fuck is she anyway? I dont know, I think about shit like that. This whole operation seems pretty fucking random. The jury is still out on this being a Blowed Idea, but Im starting to lean towards fuck yes.
But let me point out a few things about this shit here.

1. “Ta-Dow”

2. The MC Hammer Picture

3. “Good Bye old friend” lol give this man an emmy or something. He lookd hella said to be losing that toilet lmao.

4. Seriously…. “My Gold Sledge Hammer”?!?! I know Im not high and paranoid. Im almost certain somebody over there is trying to fucking kill me. I thought I was gonna suffocate.

Coke Zero: Mean Troy

Call me what you want, but I think grown men screaming in fear is never not funny. WOOOOOO!!!!

CareerBuilder.com: Tips

I thought this was fucking THE GUTS! Gotdammit lmao.

1. Frustrated people make me laugh. Dont ask me why. That lady screaming. Gutty.

2. “Hey Dummy” + Accent = Gutty!!

3. Again… Frustrated people make me laugh. This fat white dude cryin, with the last little whine. fuck. lol

4. First of all. What kind of person day dreams of punching small animals? OK? In the first place. Seriously. But then…. It was a koala bear, widly regarded as an super adorable animal. The muthafucka had an english accent. “Oh Dear”. Anybody that says some shit like “Oh Dear”... with glasses on, and holding on to some coffee is automatically obnoxious on some level. So this muthafucaka is dreaming of attacking a koala bear under ridiculous circumstances with glasses on, mind you. While he is holding on to a cup of would be hot coffee and dear life, because he is in a fucking tree. Which means he is vulnerable as possible at the end of all of that. And this person hates their job so much they are thinking of doing this ridiculous ass shit, just because theyre mad. Thats some hilarious ass shit lmaolmaolmaolmao oh shit..

5. Two words “Its Gold!” .... fucking shit. The laugh was a great kicker.

This shit had me gasping for air the first time I saw it. But I hate shit that repeats and watching shit over and over again. Im going to hate watching this commercial in a few days.

Damn, maybe I actually liked more commercials that I thought. This is getting pretty long though. Part 2 coming soon.