July 2005 - Uhmah Park

a convo between me and max…

OJ: im going to smooke
OJ: i cant think lol
Max: lol dam
OJ: im starving lol
OJ: i cant even think
OJ: you know
OJ: as much as bruce bruce sweat on stage…
OJ: you would think he would have lost a pound or 54
Max: LMAO
Max: hey you can’t lose 2 lbs on stage
Max: then eat like 4 lbs of popeyes afterward
Max: shit dont work like that
OJ: LMAO
OJ: have you seen this fuckin burger king commercial?
Max: which one
OJ: the rock and roll one
OJ: them niggas on stage with chicken heads on
Max: lol yea
OJ: well.. a few things…
OJ: that song is fuckin bangin lol
OJ: that… or either im just really high
OJ: but the shit is bangin lol
OJ: next….
OJ: them chicken fries look like they might be kinda good
OJ: and i dont even be fuckin with burger king at all
OJ: i only know where ONE is out here to prove mypoint lol
Max: u know I have thought about getting some on more than one occasion
OJ: and its far from me… to really nail it home lol
OJ: man… them shits look like they might be good…
OJ: but while they might be good n shit…
OJ: is it me..
OJ: or can burger king make chicken look REALLY fuckin undesireable like a muthafucka
OJ: nigga did you see the cross dressing chicken?
OJ: that shit was nasty as fuck…
OJ: they had some other chicken costume n shit…
OJ: ugh…
OJ: and then the rock band…
OJ: why the song was live…
Max: LOL
OJ: but they was all sweatin n shit…
OJ: nigga… chicken is suppose to look EDITABLE
Max: e d i b l e
OJ: lmao
Max: LOL @ editable
OJ: yea… im REAL blowed…
OJ: anyway… lol
Max: like u can cut n paste the chicken
OJ: LMAO fuck you lmao
OJ: HA!! muthafucka!! lmao
OJ: anyway…
OJ: but yea… i dont give a fuck if the chicken can walk and talk…
OJ: that muthafucka NEEDS to look like it can be killed and fried homie…
OJ: i cant fuck with burger king because of that!
Max: LOL
OJ: sweaty ass chicken nigga…
OJ: that shit should be against the fucking law
OJ: shits fuckin gross!!!
Max: LOL
Max: yea u are blowed
OJ: think about that tho….
Max: aint nobody gone eat a damn chicken that can talk
OJ: nigga… does a burger king commercial make you hungry?!
OJ: LMAO!!!!!
OJ: im sayin tho… the point of the commercial is to sell chicken…
Max: unless its that foghorn leghorn mufucka from looney toons
OJ: LOL
Max: I’M A CHICKENHAWK
OJ: lol
Max: AND I HUNT CHICKENS!
OJ: LOL
OJ: nigga tho… my point is… you suppose to want to EAT the chicken… if they trying to sell the shit. and like YOU said…aint nobody gone eat a chicken that can talk…
OJ: but if it could… its gonna have to NOT look sweaty as fuck
OJ: and all nasty and dingy n shit
Max: but yeah, burger king commercials are creepy as hell anyway
OJ: chicken look like trailer trash n shit
OJ: EXACTLY!!!!
OJ: i was gonna get to that…
Max: its like, ALL them shits are fucked up
OJ: ALL they gotdamn commercials is hella creepy
OJ: yes nigga!!!
Max: I was lookin at the one for that other chicken sandwich
OJ: that nigga with the mask be mean muggin muhfuckas n shit
OJ: he all tall…
Max: I was like, damn, Hootie done fell off….
OJ: nigga look like jason with a differnt mask on n shit
OJ: lol hell naw
Max: yeah that king will give a kid nightmares
OJ: fuck yes nigga!
OJ: somebody needs they ass tar’d and feathered out this bitch…
Max: just think if u was high as hell, and all of a sudden THAT nigga was at your window….
OJ: way to have uneffected ass marketing!
OJ: EXACTLY!!!!!!
OJ: with that creepy ass smile n shit!!!
OJ: just staring at you
OJ: moving all slow and creepy n shit
Max: niggas will get to shootin that mufucka
Max: but then, McDonalds commercials are coontastic
OJ: im saying…
OJ: that nigga is SWING FIRST scarey….
OJ: hey….
Max: yes…
OJ: id rather deal with a buncha lame ass niggas than team creepy king & chicken
Max: LOL true
OJ: im lovin it….
Max: MCDONALD’S, NIGGA, WHAT?!?!?!
OJ: or… WHY IS THAT NIGGA JUST STARING AT ME LIKE THAT
OJ: LMAO!!!!!!!!!!
Max: that shit was KILLIN me
OJ: i couldnt say id really stop eating mcdonalds if they came out with a billboard like that tho
Max: I wouldnt
OJ: LMAO!!!1
Max: that shit would be funny as hell tho
OJ: nigga… honestly… that shit would show the UPMOST respect for the black dollar…
OJ: oh yea… then it woudl be funny as fuck…
Max: al sharpton n jesse would have a fit tho
OJ: but if a gotdamn mcdonalds that the balls to do that shit… i mean really lol….
OJ: nigga… im SURE that shit would be clear from the get lol
Max: a ghetto mcdonalds, probably
Max: or McDowells…
OJ: LMAO!!!!!!!!! HOLY SHIT LMAO!!!!!!
OJ: GUTTY SHIT!!!!!
OJ: MCDOWELLS NIGGA WHAT?!?!?!?!?!?
OJ: lmao
Max: lollool
OJ: lol would you be LESS mad if a black eatry did such a thing tho
Max: actually I would
OJ: lmao hell yea

ahhh that was the guts… imma go make me something to eat now… nigga still aint ate!!!


Some time ago… i got real blowed, and i shared my views on the threat made to several Black Americans…. “Ill Slap The Black Off You!” a pretty vicious threat.

but today… im blowed… and i thought about a phrase one very irate individual could threaten a man with…. the removal of his testicals, by force no less!!!

think about that…

some one… is gonna take you ( guys reading this ) and put you in such a position to cut off your muthafuckin balls.

snip snip.

cut your muthafuckin balls off… they gone. you got them taken from you. GIMME THOSE!! your balls no longer belong to you… they have been TAKEN FROM YOU! your BALLS! taken!!! its not like a car… that you park and walk away from. come back to some glass on the ground and youre left feeling voilated. well i guess if somebody cut your muthafuckin balls off… feeling voilated is only the fuckin begining lol.

lol would you go on a mission to get your balls back tho? on some… hey! you took my balls! i want them back muthafucka!

im sure after youve had your fucking balls cut off… and you go about fucking up the individual who got you for your sack…. im sure your sack would no longer be any good. so what would the the point right? well i suppose… for one… them there is YOUR balls. if they were cut off… they at least need to be in your care. i mean… im sure he cared enough to keep em intially, shit just didnt work out that way. of course any man is gonna fight to keep his balls. surely he would fight even harder to get them back. at least, i would. id have to fucking murder the muhfucka that cut my balls off… there is no understanding. i dont care if in my sack was the cure for AIDS, Cancer, and the sniffles. ill BE that shelfish bastard… fuck that. You plan on forcefully taking my gotdamn balls… youre gonna be in for the fight of your life. youd have better luck slap boxing with a 800 pound gorilla.

i dont think anybody would understand lol. “Yes… it was i who cut off your fucking balls. BUT! we cut them off because in your sack, resided the cure for AIDS, Cancer and the sniffles. this some ground breaking shit, your balls are gonna change the world!!” that would not be good enough for me. much pain and suffering would soon follow. lol actually i wouldnt even kill him… id cut off HIS muthafuckin balls. like now we even bitch!! lol find the cure for the sniffles in your own gotdamn balls muthafucka!!!

lol damn!

how do you think you would possibly feel after having your balls taken off? how could you function as a man after you have been fucking ball jacked!!

how are you gonna get ass after that?

are you gonna tell your would be mate before the shag… or are you gonna hope she doenst notice that you are fucking ball-less. you are man, with out balls. lol

if you decide to tell her… how would you break it to her. like… i know we’ve been getting closer… and chances are im going to be cuttin those pretty soon. but i think there i something you should know… a while ago, something very bad happen to me that left me… well, thats another story… sigh. i have no balls

lol i wonder what a muhfucka face would look like when you told them that. what if the girl you was messing with… really liked her some balls. imagine her disapointment! like oh no… no balls?

what if she stoped fucking with you because of that. lol how would that amke you feel? would you hate her… like fuck you too bitch!!! I DONT HAVE BALLS BUT I HAVE A HEART!!!!

you would have to start payin for ass… getting prostitutes n shit. im sure a hooker or two would notice. but what is she gonna really say. ew im not gonna take this money to fuck you… you have no balls. lol lol if she did tho… gotdamn. i mean, just when you thought shit couldnt get any more fucked up. lol

a ball-less life as a man has to be a hard life.

lol why do yall put up with me?

this is not what blogging is suppose to be about!

what is blogging suppose to be about?
well, clearly ive never had a clue what blogging is suppose to be about.. i just know this aint it. lol

and i honestly dont care to really find the fuck out lol.


ok… so im more than flagrantly unsober. but im thinking that what im about to say, explains alot.

so i recorded the 05 BET Awards…

and its no secert that both Mariah Carrey and Luaren Hill didnt sound like themselves. and thats all imma say about that….

but i think i know why they why they didnt sound thier respective normal selves.

i think its because, missy had a blunt backstage…. and got luaren hill and mariah carrey hella blowed before the show started.

thats the only thing that makes since… luaren was up there hot as FUCK… sweatin and shit. she had that BIG ass muthafuckin bow… the koopa troopa wig n shit. covered from head to toe… looked like she couldnt breathe n shit. When you face a blunt… youre gonna sound like that, look all hot and constricted in some shit like that. its the blunt tellin all on you, real bad.

and then mariah… i HEAR her mic was fucked up. but she didnt come thru really either… and she know it. she was up there lookin like she was too blowed to be trying to dish out that stellar proformance lol. and her voice was all raspy and fading n shit. come on… if that aint the blunt talking, i dont know what is…

but that is the only thing that is making sense to me right now.

and real quick… john ledgend has to be gay. and i refuse to believe other wise.
i also dont like that ordinary people shit. i dont care how much it sound like ribbons in the sky! gotdammit.


im sorry… but that there is the phrase that pays.

its some real shit. its some simple shit… but its some real shit. reguardless of the source and what you may think about that niggas flows ( im talkin about mike jones for the muthafuckas that been under a rock for however long… thank you for joining us, you slow muthafuckas. )

you can think that nigga dumb or whatever the fuck. but you cant despute thats some real shit.

anyway… i say that because i havent been posting on this muthafucka lately. surprise surpise lol. but thats only because a nigga has been working his ASS off. and im STILL busy. busy as the fuck. i stay busy. i have so many personal projects i wanna do, but i cant do them because a nigga is working all the time. 15 hour days n shit.

its ok… by the end of the summer and the end of the year… it will all hopefully pay off…

anyway… speaking of mike jones.

i have a new phrase of my own… recently… lol … every time ive been astonished or shocked i been yellin out “mikejooooones!!!” lol i dont know how it started. i think i was real high or real drunk one day… and instead of saying DAAAAAAMN! i said “mikejones!!”

shit was the guts. try it… youll laugh. and if you dont. youre wack lol.

and while we are on the subject still… of the latest thing out of the south…

back then is The Vapors – 2005.

lol every time i hear that shit, i think of a few of the girls i went to highschool with that ive seen after highschool.

heh!